Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of StansaidAirport's best tweets

@StansaidAirport : I live in constant fear that someone will abduct my mother in law at 35 Ash Street, London, Flat 2, door is sticky buzz Carol to let you in.

@StansaidAirport: People who clap when the plane lands don't aim particularly high do they?

@StansaidAirport: Festive Fact: Women who put on weight over the festive period are 98% more likely to live longer than their partners who point it out.

@StansaidAirport: The 9:50 from Paris has been diverted. Nothing to do with the weather, we just don't like the French.

@StansaidAirport: Do you like freezing to death and knocking down trees with your face? Well why not book a skiing holiday?

@StansaidAirport: If you removed every blade from a 747's engines and laid them end to end, you'd go to prison for rendering useless a $357 million aircraft.