Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets
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@TheDeadfishSays : Me: For who the bell tolls...
Teacher: You forgot the 'M'.
Me: For who them bells toll...
@TheDeadfishSays: The most frustrating thing I've ever tried to do was throw away a trash can.
@TheDeadfishSays: "I don't want to make a spectacle..."
Eye glass manufacturers last day on the job.
@TheDeadfishSays: I sit in the corner eating my tortillas completely confused by this salsa class.
@TheDeadfishSays: "Everything the light touches is ours," I tell my son while opening the fridge.