@TitaniumToplass: Just found out that umbrellas open up. I always wondered why my rain stick never kept me dry. We never stop learning do we.
@TitaniumToplass: Just wrote "except for you, spiders >:(" on my Welcome mat so that should be the end of that
@TitaniumToplass: Girls are like tornadoes because in pictures it's like wow those look cool but in person it's all omg what do I do
@TitaniumToplass: It's impossible to slowly tiptoe around without activating T-Rex arms.
@TitaniumToplass: DiCaprio movie endings;
Shutter Island: is he dead?
Titanic: is the boat dead?
Romeo & Juliet: is everyone dead?
Inception: am I dead?
@TitaniumToplass: use words like 'perpendicular' when you language at people so they think you is good with vocabularying
@TitaniumToplass: *casually walks into a crowded Sushi Restaurant wearing a dolphin costume* *suddenly stops, looks horrified, & backs slowly out the door*
@TitaniumToplass: I jump out of bushes to give surprise breast exams. I save lives. nnThe police are on the lookout for me. Probably to give me an award.