@WigCannon: alright. if everything happens for a reason why did i put a scarecrow in the shower
@WigCannon: your call is important to us. like, super important. we all bought new outfits for this call. dave is wearing a wig
@WigCannon: before stairs there'd be someone on the second floor and people would ask "how'd you get up there" and they'd be like "i don't know"
@WigCannon: before x-rays doctors had to climb inside people and draw a picture of their bones. some still do
@WigCannon: Do you know why I pulled you over?
"Yes, because I was driving a motorized toilet."
I meant this time
Please step out of the oven.
@WigCannon: What if the missing plane is still up there?
Did you check the sky?
See, this is why you'll never advance, Kevin.
@WigCannon: Eventually, some poor astronaut is going to crash into all that Star Wars writing
@WigCannon: "Can I see your ID?"
*lowers them again*
"What are you doing?"
I don't know.