Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of buhsbaby_baby's best tweets

@buhsbaby_baby : [first date] Me: so... have you..eaten dinner before?

@buhsbaby_baby: Stranger: Ooohh what breed is he?!

Me *rolling my eyes* : He's a doggie.

@buhsbaby_baby: [before sex]

Just so you know.. I can only be on top cause' I'm not gonna take my backpack off

@buhsbaby_baby: Liquor Store Cashier: Wow! Big party this weekend?

Me: No.

@buhsbaby_baby: You know what I'd like for Christmas, mom? I'd like you to stop treating me like a child. Also I'd like some money and some new socks.

@buhsbaby_baby: If by "be (your) girlfriend" you mean "catch spiders and hide them in your pockets everyday" then yes, I'll be your girlfriend.

@buhsbaby_baby: Spiderman ruined romance for me. Please don't even think of kissing me unless you're hanging upside down from a building.

@buhsbaby_baby: Me: I LOVE Pokémon Go!
Him: Are you just collecting caterpillars and putting them in your purse?!
Me:

@buhsbaby_baby: Him: So what are you into?
Me: *thinking of the newspaper cutouts of Justin Trudeau all over my bedroom walls and ceiling* Politics.