Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of careworn's best tweets

@careworn : If you don't want me to sing at your kids then don't name them Roxanne.

@careworn: When a guy wearing cargo pants hits on me I'm tempted to go out with him just to see how many of my belongings I can fit into his pockets.

@careworn: Why do people insist on saying "You're next" to me at weddings? Do they not realize how serial killery that is?