@darksidedeb: [on a date]
Him: I love the law.
Me: [trying to impress] I like food courts.
@darksidedeb: Anyone who believes that the customer is always right has clearly never worked in retail.
Or met people.
@darksidedeb: Can you imagine the pressure Morgan Freeman's mom felt reading him a bedtime story?
@darksidedeb: Maybe I'm driving around with my coffee on the roof because I want to cool it down. YOU DON'T KNOW.
@darksidedeb: I've started slipping an occasional "meow" into everyday conversations with people to see if they're really listening meow to me.