@djr_102: My sister just had a baby and she seems to have forgotten all about my problems.
@djr_102: Women love shy guys with some sensitive sensibilities. They also love confidence and assertiveness. So, have multiple personality disorder.
@djr_102: I'm an okay dancer until I whip out the finger guns, then I'm just majestic.
@djr_102: Spice up your Facebook timeline when someone's status turns to "It's complicated" by posting "thanks for last night" underneath it.
@djr_102: I broke up with a girl once by leaving a note on the front door that simply said: "Love doesn't live here anymore, and now, neither do you."
@djr_102: Sometimes you just have to roll down your car window and bark at people to see what they do.