Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of fsuflores's best tweets

@fsuflores : According to really smart people I should have started saving 20 years ago.

@fsuflores: I feel so bad for all these women that give me their phone numbers and when I call the line has been disconnected

This economy is ruthless.

@fsuflores: It's unfortunate when pasta night turns into a surprise family intervention.

@fsuflores: I'm always careful with women that do not speak to me even after the 4th date.

@fsuflores: An ice bucket challenge ...

But for when teenagers don't want to get out of bed and get ready for school.