@lawyerthoughts: I need to work on controlling the look on my face when I'm listening to stupid people.
@lawyerthoughts: court: counsel why are you yelling your questions from back there?
me: i've got my phone plugged in back here your honor.
@lawyerthoughts: Them: sir there's no food allowed in here.
Me: this is my service burrito.
@lawyerthoughts: Your honor? My client would like to address the court and ruin everything.
@lawyerthoughts: *throws phone over courthouse metal detector. catches phone on the other side. resumes conversation*
@lawyerthoughts: Dear law students: my opposing counsel just asked her witness how old she was when she turned 18. You'll be fine.
@lawyerthoughts: First they ignore your fanny pack, then they laugh at your fanny pack, then they see you eat gummy bears from your fanny pack, then you win.
@lawyerthoughts: If your entire outfit can be purchased at a gas station it's not appropriate for court.
@lawyerthoughts: Hey people who don't understand sarcasm, what's it like being so awesome?