Funny Tweeter

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Page of lisaxy424's best tweets

@lisaxy424 : I feel like my relationship with the Walking Dead started so great and we had some good times but now we’re only staying together for the kids.

@lisaxy424: boss: WORKING HARD OR HARDLY WORKING?
me: HAHAHA

[later]

cw: WORKING HARD OR HARDLY WORKING?
me: literally never talk to me gary

@lisaxy424: Passed a gym sign that said “Have those new yoga pants been to yoga yet?” and I feel personally attacked.

@lisaxy424: me: I ONLY GOT 3 HOURS OF SLEEP LAST NIGHT AND I FEEL GREAT MY BODY HAS FINALLY LEARNED TO EFFECTIVELY AND EFFICIENTLY USE ENERGY

me, 4 minutes later: o god i am dying

@lisaxy424: Female fishermen should be called Broadcasters.

@lisaxy424: I just said “haha omg I love your ugly sweater!” to my CW knowing full well it’s just one of her normal sweaters.

@lisaxy424: [before nap]

I’ll be really productive once I get some sleep!

[after nap]

well now it’s way too late to do anything

@lisaxy424: 1997 middle school me learning about Rome: But how could such a developed and rich society collapse so suddenly?

2017 me: oh

@lisaxy424: [someone breaks into the house]

Your dog: I will protect my family and our belongings

My dog: OMG OMG NEW FRIENDS HI I LOVE YOU LETS PLAY

@lisaxy424: my dog when its nice out: *jumps in pond, rolls in dirt, eats goose poo*

when raining: MADAM how DARE u take me into these AWFUL conditions