Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of livlivme_do's best tweets

@livlivme_do : me (buying wine): do you need to see my ID? cashier: no, you're old enough, I can tell me: okay, I don’t even want it anymore

@livlivme_do: If Rod Stewart ever cleared his throat, his career would be over.

@livlivme_do: The lord giveth, and the lord slappeth that shit right out of your hands.

@livlivme_do: Just finished writing a book for new parents called “You Just Made a Big Mistake.”