Funny Tweeter

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Page of lovemyboots111's best tweets

@lovemyboots111 : Sarcasm : Because life doesn't come with a free "stay out of jail card"

@lovemyboots111: I hate when I stand on a scale and it starts to cry and begs me to get off

@lovemyboots111: Sometimes when you first meet someone you just know you want to spend the rest of your life....

Avoiding them

@lovemyboots111: How do you know your man is cheating?

When he drives by her place the wifi connects

@lovemyboots111: "One day I caught myself smiling for no reason, then I realized I was thinking of you...."

under a moving bus

@lovemyboots111: Women are like, "no I'm not mad"

*sets your car on fire*

Nope not mad

@lovemyboots111: Are you guys sure common sense can't be beaten into people ? Because I'd like to give it try!

@lovemyboots111: I saw a smart car get hit with a snow ball today, yep, it was totalled!

@lovemyboots111: Apparently asking the boss " who ignited the fuse on your tampon?" will get you sent to HR.

@lovemyboots111: I'm at the age where an "all-nighter" means I didn't have to get up to pee