Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of maurajbg's best tweets

@maurajbg : *sees a newborn baby* One day, someone will write mean things about you on the Internet

@maurajbg: A bird laments over the corpse of its fallen comrade. "Tern down. For what?"

@maurajbg: I'm naming all my children after Instagram filters. Hudson, Walden, Valencia, Kelvin, Brannan, Willow, and the twins, Toaster and 1977.

@maurajbg: ME: Say "Anagrams are stupid" one more time & I will rearrange your face.
YOU: Anagrams are stupid.
ME: You farce.