Funny Tweeter

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Page of nayele18maybe's best tweets

@nayele18maybe : Hate it when I tell a guy something deeply intimate and personal and he’s all, “Ma’am, does that complete your order?”

@nayele18maybe: After how many years should you clean your microwave?

@nayele18maybe: I’ve never applied makeup while driving, but I have eaten an entire rotisserie chicken.

@nayele18maybe: If you respond, “A reason for living,” when a store employee asks if they can help you find something, they will leave you alone.

@nayele18maybe: Shoutout to the toothpaste stain on my shirt for making it appear that I had a WAY better time this morning than I actually did.

@nayele18maybe: My childhood was fairly normal and I still turned out like this.

@nayele18maybe: Him: You seem super chill.

Me: You seem like a bad judge of character.

@nayele18maybe: I'm worried that if there is ever a fire at my house, my kids will ignore the smoke detectors and sit down at the dinner table.