@notalogin: Morpheus: take the blue pill, the story ends. Take the red pill, I show you how deep the rabbit hole goes
Dog: (staring at gray pills) Crap
@notalogin: What kind of doctor are you?
-No, apathologist. People come to me when they need medical don't care.
@notalogin: The average person swallows 8 spiders in their sleep but it's actually one guy who's chowing down like 7500 a night to make the numbers work
@notalogin: The order the Star Wars movies are being released is based on the order in which Yoda would count from one to nine.
@notalogin: First they came for the people who say "Awesome sauce," and I said nothing, because, frankly, those people deserve it.
CEO: Why do you think you'd be a good fit at our firm?
GUY WHOSE DESCRIPTION IS SO LONG HE DOESN'T ACTUALLY GET TO SAY ANYTHING: