@sarcasticmommy4: My family went camping & left me home alone, like I'd be missing out.
Oh please, don't leave me home with electricity & running water.
@sarcasticmommy4: Summer vacation would probably be a little more relaxing if these kids were vacationing somewhere else.
@sarcasticmommy4: My kids said they wanted to try something new this summer so I showed them how to vacuum & do laundry.
@sarcasticmommy4: I'm not a helicopter mom.
I'm more of a "come & get me only if there's blood" kind of mom.
@sarcasticmommy4: Kids: Yay! Summer break!
Me: Not so fast. Let me introduce you to...THE GREAT SUMMER CHORE CHART OF 2017!
*3 kids faint, 1 runs away*
@sarcasticmommy4: My son asked for help with his math homework as we pulled into the school parking lot.
Then I laughed & laughed & told him to get out.
@sarcasticmommy4: Me: It's been a while since we've had to take one of the kids to the ER.
Trampoline: Hold my beer.
@sarcasticmommy4: If you think you're having a bad morning, my son is crying because his sock doesn't feel right.
@sarcasticmommy4: If you're not sure about having kids, have someone say "Mom!" 100 times before 7am & see if it's right for you.