@skickwriter: I stole one of those Krispy Kreme "HOT NOW" signs and hung it over our bed because good communication is important in a marriage.
@skickwriter: I have a confession...
I don't like Oreos.
And it feels so great getting that off my chest!
*blocked by all of Twitter*
@skickwriter: Offering $50 and a case of beer to anyone who can take out my alarm clock and make it look like an accident.
@skickwriter: Him: *running* That's not what they mean when they say, "Chicks dig scars!"
Me: *shovel in hand* It's what this chick means.
@skickwriter: Me: He said he likes mac-n-cheese better the way his mom makes it.
Female judge: Case dismissed!
@skickwriter: Sorry, but that was only my favorite food in the world BEFORE you bought 5 cases of it at Costco.
@skickwriter: 5 & 8:
Mommy, may I wear these boots?
Can you find my jeans?
Will you brush my hair?
Will you tie my shoes?
Mommy, why aren't you ready?
@skickwriter: My microwave broke. So, we're finding innovative alternatives. Did y'all know the surface on top of the oven heats up, too? Honest to God.