Funny Tweeter

Your daily dose of unadulterated funny tweets

Page of stewnami's best tweets

@stewnami : I like a woman that makes me feel alive, but also lets me know that it might not be for long.

@stewnami: She kept yelling "Choke!, Choke!" to me during sex.

So rude. Why would she want me to have a bad performance?

@stewnami: Stealing being illegal is why I can't have nice things.

@stewnami: They add a scent to natural gas so we can smell it if there's a leak and we're in danger. Same reason Axe Body Spray has a scent.

@stewnami: I'm fat, so when I get mad, I get massive aggressive.

@stewnami: I just burped and fogged my glasses up. Line forms to the left ladies.