@texasstalkermom: Ways to get me naked:
1. Be hot
2. Be funny
3. Be alcohol
4. Pretend to be my gynecologist
@texasstalkermom: I only have Facebook to keep track of where everyone I know is going to be, so I don't show up there.
@texasstalkermom: If you want to intimidate anyone with your screaming and honking, you may need to rethink those reindeer antlers on your car.
@texasstalkermom: Want his attention?
Want to piss him off?
When he responds,
reply "Oops, wrong person"
@texasstalkermom: How many beer trucks can you "accidentally" run into before your insurance company becomes suspicious?