Funny Tweeter

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Page of urmumsausername's best tweets

@urmumsausername : My son just walked into the room, said hello, asked how I was, then left. He didn't actually want anything. I know! Incredible! Oh and then I fainted.

@urmumsausername: Now I lay me down to sleep
I hope you like this and retweet
If I should die before I wake
I may have eaten too much cake

@urmumsausername: I saw a TV for sale for only £1 because the volume button was stuck
Did I buy it?
Of course I did!
Well, I couldn't turn it down
Could I?

@urmumsausername: Dear America

Would you please take the 's' off the word 'legos' and put it back on the word 'math' where it belongs.

Many thanks