@urmumsausername: Now I lay me down to sleep
I hope you like this and retweet
If I should die before I wake
I may have eaten too much cake
@urmumsausername: I saw a TV for sale for only £1 because the volume button was stuck
Did I buy it?
Of course I did!
Well, I couldn't turn it down
@urmumsausername: Dear America
Would you please take the 's' off the word 'legos' and put it back on the word 'math' where it belongs.