@yonewt: If my neighbor’s front yard is historically accurate baby Jesus was also visited by Spiderman
@yonewt: It seems Bichon Frisé is a dog breed and not, as indicated in the recipe, a fancy salad green. We regret any confusion this may have caused.
@yonewt: To print a document from your laptop:
1. Select document
2. Click "Print"
3. Walk over to printer to see what the damn problem is this time
@yonewt: HOW TO BE ONE OF THE COOL KIDS ON TWITTER:
1. Pick an adjective
2. Add "AF"
3. Enjoy your new life, sans shame and ridicule
@yonewt: Listening to "Bad Company" by Bad Company from their album "Bad Company" how do they come up with this stuff
@yonewt: This town's getting on my nerves, gonna blow off some steam by doing a dance routine at the abandoned warehouse.
@yonewt: You're damn right I want to complete an online survey, hand that receipt right here.