@ceejoyner: Using spin moves while allowing an opponent's sword to narrowly miss your head forces them to add majestic layers and volume to your hair.
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@Zoozich: I just really hate it when people start assuming things.nnnJust like my boss he assumes that I'm working just because I came to work today.
@thetits: COP: do you know why I pulled you over? ME: *hands him a puppy and drives off* [3 years later] COP *walking his dog*: wait a second…
@iTomFoolery: I mixed coffee with Red Bull, now I can see the invisible things my kitten pounces on.
@InternetHippo: COP: The killer wrote a message on the victim's mirror ME: You can't prove it was me COP: It was written in Dorito dust ME: I want a lawyer