@kentgrossarth: Vegetarian: 'You know, a cow died so you could have that burger'. Me: 'Maybe he died because you keep eating all of his food'.
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@Schmoodles: Whenever I meet a guy named Paul, I ask if it's short for Paula, then I laugh & laugh & laugh & laugh & laugh & making friends is hard. :(
@HairyJew4Life: Her: Did you hear that eating curry can get rid of bad memories? Me: So I should take you out for Indian AFTER we have sex?
@TheTweetOfGod: Fear and ignorance would gay-marry each other if they weren't both opposed to it.