@akatinamarie: Vegetarians live up to nine years longer. Nine horrible, tedious, meaningless, worthless, baconless, cheeseburgerless, meatless years.
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@Midgetspar: If you try to rip somebody's head off, I suggest you train for it first. If you don't succeed it makes the following few minutes awkward.
@AbbyHasIssues: People who say I'm hard to shop for obviously didn't see how excited I just got finding an almond on the couch.