@RobDenBleyker: Video games don't cause violence, they PREVENT it. Whenever I see a turtle now, I chuck it off the nearest cliff where it can't hurt anyone.
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@TheToddWilliams: I know it's International Women's Day but I'd like to give a shout out to all the national and local women as well.
@GermanFreckles: No, cough syrup, you're not grape flavoured. Have you ever tasted a grape? You taste like death and the tears of small children, not grape.
@Reverend_Scott: "Hi, I'm calling for info on your bicycle on Craigslist." It's heavy, brown, has new shoes, and loves carrots. It's definitely not a horse.
@internetluke: [trying to talk to girl] Ha so you from around here? "Ya" Cool me too. I love planet earth