@PaulyPeligroso: Wait, is Obama our second black President or our first black President again?
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@SortaBad: We can land a rover on freakin Mars but still no single-button to push for the ¯_(ツ)_/¯ emoji
@WilliamAder: First in my neighborhood to cut the grass and now the other husbands are looking at me like I reminded the teacher to assign homework.
@Ideal_Victoria: If anyone is living vicariously through me, you just bought yourself Flintstones chewable vitamins.
@Ivsy01: If he asks you to be his girlfriend say yes and then hide from him so he can never break up with you.