@PaulyPeligroso: Wait, is Obama our second black President or our first black President again?
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@LizHackett: If a bear confronts you in the woods, make it go away by handing it a flyer for your boyfriend's band's show.
@Lexi__Alexandra: "Tell me why I shouldn't report you to HR?" The doctor yelled at me when I used the defibrillator wrong. "I don't work here" I yelled back.
@peteholmes: "dance like no one is watching, walk like someone is behind you trying to get around you." - ancient nyc proverb