@better_off_dad: Wait - so Nutella isn’t Cinderella’s crazy sister?!
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@the_rock_chic: A moment of silence for all those who are stuck in traffic, trying to get to the gym, to ride stationary bikes...
@pippydrydocking: Sorry I went down on your moms sister at your BBQ... I guess you could say I'm... [lowers shades] An aunt-eater.
@junejuly12: As there aren't any female leprechauns, where do leprechauns come from ~ something to ponder every St Patrick's Day
@cariastark: Husband enters vasectomy room Nurse: You sure about this? *I enter, wearing xmas leggings & milk stained top* N: The dr. will be right in