@biorhythmist: Walked into a spider web and did an hour of tai chi in five seconds.
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@Reverend_Scott: [kisses daughter goodnight] Sleep tight. "Daddy, where do babies come from?" Um, the Stork. [stork knocks on bedroom window] He's lying.
@LetMeStart: Me: I couldn't eat another thing. Narrator: Oh, she ate another thing. And then some.