@FilthyRichmond: Walmart keeps two elderly people on staff at all times: one to greet you, and one to walk slowly in front of you on the way out.
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@hasht4g: If Pringles really wanted the fun to never stop they'd make those tube things like 5 feet long.
@AsgardianRose: I’m bored. I’m going to text my ex boyfriends and say “I have to talk to you, it’s important” and then not answer the phone for 6 days.
@qwertying: Husband: [sends text] We need to break up. Wife: [sends text] WTF! Husband: [sends text] Sorry. That was meant to go to someone else.
@WilliamAder: While I fully intended to "sleep my way to the top," it appears I've napped my way to the middle.