@AthenaMystique: Walmart pokes holes in the condoms to ensure customer retention.
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@OhNoSheTwitnt: Apparently when a trainer asks you why you want to stay in shape and you answer "revenge" it will raise a couple eyebrows.
@GrantTanaka: son: hey dad me: [picks up phone, dials 9] yes son: now don’t get mad me: [dials 1] ok son: do we have a fire extinguisher me: [dials 1]
@pickupIines: do you generate electricity with water through the process of hydropower because dam
@Book_Krazy: ME: I'd like to order...the updog. WAITER: How would u like that prepared? ME: um medium well? W: very good Me: oh god what have I just done