@somecleverthing: Want to avoid making excuses when people ask you to hang out? Always say no when someone asks "wanna hear something amazing?"
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@LurkAtHomeMom: My husband just left town for a work trip. I didn't want him to miss out on anything so I made him a mixtape of the kids whining.
@ShutUpThatsWho: [invention of blue cheese] "this cheese has gone off" sell it "but it's gone mouldy" I SAID SELL IT! "fine" & double the price "are u ok?"