@Voiceofgarth: WANTED: Call center workers with very weak english, poor communication skills and short temper needed for major bank. Bonus paid for low IQ.
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@Not_From_Troy: The girl in front of me sped up so I did too. She started to run, just like me. Then she yelled for help, me too. I wonder what we fled from
@iwearaonesie: My wife said I need to grow up. I was speechless. It's hard to say anything when you have 45 gummy bears in your mouth
@okimstillhungry: Scientist: You left the cage open and 349 frogs escaped. Me: I guess I FROGOT :) Scientist: *rubbing bridge of nose* They were poisonous.
@prtxt: Appreciate how some people don't come out of ATM till they find the meaning of life right there.
@RiverClegg: My parent trap worked perfectly. I now have five parents.
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