@ellieholcomb: Watched The Little Mermaid with my girl last night & realized that Aerial could be on an episode of Hoarders. : /
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@dafloydsta: [movie night] Her: Can I pick tonight? Me: You picked last time and it was horrible Her: WE WATCHED OUR WEDDING VIDEO
@TheMichaelRock: Why did you have to take a half naked picture in front of a full length mirror to show off your new haircut?
@WildeThingy: Louis Lane "there is no way broccoli is a superfood!" Broccoli *takes spectacles off* Louis Lane "My God! Look, it's a superfood!"
@Merman_Melville: Me: I need a raise Secretly-an-Alien Manager: Yes, it is good to, want to exchange labor for the right amount of delicious green rectangles