@Ideal_Victoria: Watching my coworkers split a cupcake three ways was more upsetting than the first time I missed my period.
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@girlontapas: I could've chosen a life of crime but it seems like it would interfere with my 9pm bedtime.
@Tups13: As a cat burglar most of my late night break-ins are actually well orchestrated attempts to pet other peoples animals.
@curlycomedy: You never see baby pigeons because pigeons are cloned by the government. Next question.