@jrdnlk: Ways Ryan Gosling and I are similar: 1. Up to date on our vaccinations 2. I dunno, that's probably it and I'm not sure about that first one.
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@NotJPo: Listen up, single people. You can only sleep with so many people. Sooooo many people. So so so many.
@lasergirl70: "Always wear a pretty bra. The worst case is nobody sees it." ~ Not an old Irish proverb
@hazelmotes1: I keep my monocle freshly waxed so it easily slips out of my eye socket and falls into my cup of tea whenever I'm shocked by your behavior.
@onion_an: [last day at job] "You've made my life a misery, I hate you all" [remembers my car is in the garage and I need a lift] "Not you tho Phil"