@TinaMav: We are the people our parents warned us about.
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@SirEviscerate: "Since you both claim to be this infant's mother, we'll cut the baby in half." OK. Sounds reasonable. "Y...uh, alright then. Let's do this."
@Sam_Alan33: Staying at a hotel tonight which means I get to play everyone's favorite game: Are you smarter than a new shower?
@murrman5: [interview after finishing last in the olympics] do you regret saying "I could win this race wearing flip flops" [pulls mic close] yes