@SkinnerSteven: We get ground beef from cows and sky beef from birds
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@NoTheOtherJohn: ATTORNEY: Ladies and gentlemen, how could my client have committed murder WHEN IT'S AGAINST THE LAW [whispering throughout courtroom]
@TamiDaBushPilot: I put my pants on just like everybody else, by getting my toes caught in the knee hole hopping around and ultimately taking out a lamp on my way down.
@paperphotoyo: [1st Date] Brain: Be cool, gurl Him: Hi, I'm Ja- Me: Toilet paper should be called crapkins Him: Netflix: So... Just you and me again, eh?