@WilliamAder: We have a local weatherman who often forecasts "changeable skies." He makes a lot of money to make that call.
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@stephenjmolloy: Cop: "You have one call - make it important!" *phone* Me: "I've been arrested for making prank calls." Man: "Who is this?" Me: "Hugh Jass."
@girl_a_whirl: [invasion] *aircrafts dropping from the sky *explosions everywhere *mass hysteria Me scrolling phone: Where was that alien invader gif?
@markedly: Just heard a young parent say “Brantley is a demon child.” Well, you’re the one who named him Brantley. Maybe take a hard look in the mirror, Judith.
@LinajkReturns: You have beautiful eyes. Too bad they're attached to the head of a stark raving lunatic.