@alisonforns: "We have literally a zillion binders full of selfies." - Top Secret NSA Memo
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@Carbosly: Have we tried unplugging coma victims and plugging them in again? Works for my computer.
@JennyJohnsonHi5: Girl from my high school posted on Facebook that she got a "constellation prize" at a church carnival yesterday. She skipped school a lot.
@MorganJ7: Normal people flirting: Hey you're cute we should go out sometime Me flirting: So do you like bread