@markleggett: We only have world peace today thanks to the tireless efforts of thousands of former beauty queens who didn't give up on their dreams.
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@TheCatWhisprer: My favorite thing about all the people waiting in line for the new iPhones is for those hours the rest of the world is a better place.
@Shock_Monster: How To Get Rich: 1. Place a Swear Jar next to Samuel L Jackson. 2. Empty it the next day. 3. Become a millionaire.
@puffin7911: When I say to my kids "sit here and watch cartoons" they hear "come and bug me while I am trying to take naughty pictures for daddy."