@lonelydandruff: we r all Mehmet
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@BareChesty: You know your driving really sucks when your GPS says "After 300 yards, stop and let me out"
@SSDated: Me: *crawls in window* Him: What are you doing?! Me: You're my boyfriend now? Him: I'm calling the cops Me: But you retweeted me??
@JohnLyonTweets: Adam and Eve were the first people to agree to the Apple terms and conditions without reading them.