@lasergirl70: Wearing a pretty new bra today that nobody else is gonna see, so everytime I go to the bathroom, I flash myself in the mirror.
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@Gre_Gone: *clicks on hotel tv's Adult Zone* "Oh hell yeah." *it's just a bunch of people paying bills and doing yard work* "...Oh hell yeah."
@carlyken: *walks into work 20 minutes late* *boss glares at me* "Sorry. Traffic." *boss gestures to my Starbucks cup* "Oh this? I found it."
@notthattom: i talk to dumb ppl the same way i talk to a puppy... "who's blocking the exit?? WHO? who's blockin' the way!?! YOU are! yes you are!!!"
@T_Bonezzz_: Dear women who just gave birth, Stop naming your child 'Khalessi'. Sincerely, The rest of the human race