@ImaFlyontheWall: Wears a black shirt to a first dates house to see if shes lying about having cats
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@DirtMcTurd: "We have a new product, it washes hair but it needs a name" Shamcrap?! "Awful" Shampoop?! "Get out!" Shampoo? "Genius!"
@InternetHippo: [my cell phone rings] ME (a person who pays a monthly fee to allow this): Ugh why is this happening
@causticbob: what's the medical term for a female-to-male gender reassignment surgery? an addadictomy