@trojansauce: *wears one gryffindor and one slytherin sock to work to represent the internal human struggle between good and evil*
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@littlekitnerboy: Id like to thank the Walmart cashier for making me feel like big money. I guess you don't see many $20 bills, glad you made sure its legit.
@therealeatwood: [Self-Checkout] ME: also I ate a donut in the store MACHINE: Place the item on the belt ME: I can’t because I ate it MACHINE: Place the
@_ElvishPresley_: CHIEF: say hi to ur new partner ME: new partner? If it's another duck– *goose with a badge waddles in* ME: okay but i'm driving this time