@YoungNobler: #wecanlandonacometbutwecant let a comet land on us. - Yakov Smirnoff
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@DeepDarkFear: If a group of lions is called a pride, then a group of humans should be called an embarrassment.
@dubiousgenius: Scientists say Spider-Man would not be able to climb vertical surfaces due to his size. It's almost like someone made the whole thing up.
@lalenguafuerte: Rihanna says, "chains & whips excite me." I doubt her ancestors felt the same way...