@Parentpains: Weird, my coworker has bragged all day about his pending vacation and now his headlights have kicked themselves in.
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@joeljeffrey: That awkward sexual tension when everyone leaves the kitchen and you're left all alone with a chocolate cake.
@dankmtl: Confession: I'm a fake gamer guy. This gut? Prosthetic. These shorts? Armani. Even this bag of cheetos is filled with healthy baby carrots!
@jdforshort: College guy: How do you like it? Me: Salty...of course *slaps down $20 CG: We'll take two pretzels with salt ~Get outta the gutter pervs
@Laser_Cat: *two turtles strapping themselves to a sleeping cheetah* Just you wait, Carl! This is gonna be awesome!