@weinerdog4life: Welcome to Bed Bath & Beyond, here's your gun, shoot anything that comes out of the Beyond
YOU MIGHT ALSO LIKE
@T_Bonezzz_: A Library is a good place to get in a fight with ur girlfriend cuz its the only place u can get away with saying "Shhh" w/out being murdered
@Home_Halfway: Dad: Tall latte Barista: Sure thing. Can I get a name? Dad: What your parents didn't give you one? *all the other dad's give him high fives*
@FuckabillyRex: Instead of a post-workout protein shake I have mashed potatoes and gravy and instead of working out I have mashed potatoes and gravy.
@XplodingUnicorn: Me: Check out that car. It has 400 horses. 5-year-old: Where does all the poop go?