@WigCannon: welcome to denny's. don't eat that brown stuff. that's tables
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@Kernsti: Doctors love to slip in that worst case scenario. "It could be a cold or strep throat or WEST NILE VIRUS but I'm sure it's nothing."
@slimmy_shady: Me: "Get me a newspaper."Friend: "Don't be silly. Here. Borrow my iPad." Poor spider never knew what hit it.
@withanewname: *Jesus sits down at the bar* "The boss says we have to start charging you for water"
@slimmy_shady: 20% of traffic accidents involve deer.Who allowed deer to drive in the first place?