@trevso_electric: Welcome to earth! You have a choice of private parts. Would you like the one that creates life & bleeds or the constant bad decision maker?
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@AGreaterMonster: As it turns out you cannot recharge your cell plugging it in to an electric eel. I'm just glad this aquarium had a paramedic on duty.
@AtticusFinch79: [bakery] Him: This wedding cake is perfect for us! Look at all of the tiers! Me: Definitely not happy tears Him: What? Me: What?
@SoVeryBritish: British seasons: Spring: Two months Summer: Eight minutes Autumn: Three weeks Winter: Seven years